Taking responsibility when a girlfriend is pregnant
Even when you take precautions, pregnancy can happen. Taking responsibility when a girlfriend is pregnant is not just the right thing to do – it’s the best way to ensure that you have a voice in decisions that are made about the pregnancy. When you are a steady, calming support system for your pregnant girlfriend, she will know that she can trust you to be her partner in decision-making. Our licensed Texas adoption agency is here to help you both by helping you learn about adoption and parenting, so you can make informed decisions together.
What is my responsibility if my girlfriend is pregnant?
Neither you nor your girlfriend planned on a pregnancy right now, but now that you are here, you must make some tough decisions together. As the father, your biggest responsibility to take on some of the responsibility for the situation. Stepping up as a partner and supporting your girlfriend right now can go a long way toward finding a path forward that you can both agree on.
- Start by listening. Your girlfriend is likely worried and anxious about this unexpected pregnancy. You are probably feeling the same way. It’s important for you to listen to her feelings without judgment, so that she knows she can trust you to help her through.
- Don’t pressure her. Now is not the time to try to persuade her to handle this your preferred way. Your responsibility when your girlfriend is pregnant is to work with her to arrive at a decision together, taking both partners’ feelings into consideration.
- Help her get medical care. Prenatal care is essential for the health of both your girlfriend and the baby. Help her make the necessary doctor appointments, and go with her to the appointments if you can.
- Support her physical needs. Many women feel sick during the first several weeks of pregnancy. Helping with chores and other tasks demonstrates that you care about her wellbeing.
- Plan your next steps together. You and your girlfriend must work together to decide what you want to do, whether it’s parenting the baby together or separately, or placing the baby for adoption.
- Research your options. Many expecting parents choose either cooperative parenting or adoption. Learn as much as you can about both options before you make up your minds, so there are no surprises later.
- If you choose parenting, you must support the child financially. In most cases, fathers are responsible for paying child support until the child reaches the age of 18.
It’s OK if you don’t arrive at an agreement right away. Take the time to educate yourselves about all of your options, so that you can agree upon a course of action that feels right to you both.
Many fathers feel an intense sense of responsibility when a girlfriend is pregnant, and some feel obligated to step up to parent the child. But for some men, the realities of raising a baby can be overwhelming, and making an adoption plan feels like a better option for providing a child with an abundant life.
Whatever path you and your girlfriend ultimately decide to take, it’s your responsibility to stand by her and support her through this pregnancy. Remaining calm and involved can help her feel less alone, and doing so encourages her to respect your feelings, too.
If you want to learn about adoption, we can help
Our licensed Texas adoption agency welcomes questions from expecting fathers who want to learn more about adoption, or who may need help understanding whether they can realistically parent a child in their given situation. We commend you for taking responsibility when your girlfriend is pregnant. You won’t find any pressure here – just encouragement and information.
Contact us at any time to get the answers, support and information that you need.